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Some1 tex me dis and jus had to share it...dis funny as hell:

The Prime Minister was looking for a ho when he met 3 women. A Cuban, an American and a Bahamian. He ask da Cuban how much she would charge. She said $200. He ask da American, she said $100. He ask da Bahamian; she said if u can get my skirt as high as my rent, get my g string as low as my pay, get ur cock as hard as the times & fuck me good as u fuck up dis country den u can grind me 4 free.

Love Poem (bahamian remix)
Gal I was inta you,
and das fa sure.
Or I wouldna told dem udda dawtas
don tex me no mo.

I figgerd it was true,
the first day I seeked at you.
Why you tink I do,
the tings I do?

Remember how I use ta wine and dine you,
Kool-Aid, Stitchy and Bamboo Shack BBQ.
I gave you a bubblicious and fed you grapes.
Dey was on sale at Super Value at dolla ninety-eight.

Romantik evenins after dark,
Skreet light
walks around R M Bailey Park.
Like the very first time,
you came ova to my place.
And you got all scared,
cause that roach run pass ya face.
I was right dere,
with a can of Raid.
I couldn't afford baygon
Cuz that week civil servants didn't get paid

I ain't even pay my B.E.C bill,
so I can take you to da club.....
Don't knock ova dem candles
and frig up my rug!

And dat nite we grind,
for a long lil bit of time.
I hope you got yours,
cause fa dam sure I get mine.

I woke up ded early and made you breakfast in bed.
Cept I ain't have no juice, no grits, and no eggs.
Didn't have no corn flake and was fresh outta milk,
so we had some Johnny cake and a bowl of boil fish.

I use ta massage yo back.
It was hard to believe
I even box 919
In order to buy ya #7 weave
I flooded u wit love, like a hurricane in pinewood
but yet u and ya gals foreva sayin us niggas een no good
So b4 u step in my brand new caddy
Tell dat piss-tail jungless child
INE HE FLIPPIN DADDY!

I found this and jus had to share it....dis was 2 dred!!!

A LOVE POEM
Gal I loveded you,
Straight up fo'sho.
Or I wouldna told dem ova girls
not to call me no mo.

I knowed it was true,
the first day I seed you.
Why you thank I do,
the thangs I do?

Remember how I use ta wine and dine you,
Schlits Malt Liquor and Bar-Ba-Que.
I gave you a bubble baze and fed you grapes.
Dey was on sale that week a dolla ninety-eight.

Romanic evenins after dark,
Skreet light
walks around the block.
Like the very first time,
you came ova to my crib.
And you got all scared,
cause that roach was on yo Tims.
I was right dare,
with a can of spray.
To be yo Super Negro,
and save the day.

I ain't even pay my light bill,
so I can take you to da club.....
Don't knock ova dem candles
and burn up my rug!

And dat nite we made luv,
for a long liddle bit of time.
I hope you got yours,
cause I sho'nuff got mine.

I woke up early and made you breakfast in bed.
Sep fo I ain't have no juice, no grits, and no eggs.
Didn't have no cereals and was fresh outta milk,
so we had some toast and some potada chips.

I use to rub lotion on yo feets,
and massage yo back.
I found you some glue,
when you lost one of your tracks.
Now what man you knowed,
ever loveded you like dis.
Gal please just take my name
off dat child support list.

Finally, the true meaning of love...Let me break it down for you real quick:

L is fa the Loneliness u feel without that person every night

O is fa the Overstressing u do after a fight

V is fa the Vexation u get when ur lover and their sweetie are in sight

E is fa the Enjoyment u get when u dump the bitch and f**k all night



(from here on u can do either of two things...u can laugh and say that i'm crazy. Or you can relate to this and still say im crazy)

Dis was off da chainz!!

Gabriel came to the Lord and said,
"I have to talk to you. We have some Bahamians up here in Heaven
who are causing problems. They're swinging on the pearly gates, my
horn is missing, conch salad juice is all over their robes, their pitbulls and
potcakes (a mix breed dog) are riding in the chariots, and they're
wearing basketball caps and straw hats instead of their halos.
They refuse to keep the stairway to
Heaven clean. There are guinip seeds and chicken in the bag all
over the place. Some of them are walking around with just
one wing.
"The Lord said, "I made them special,
Gabriel. Heaven is Home to all my children.
If you really want to know about real problems, let's call the
devil."

The Devil answered the phone,
"Hello? hold on a minute."

The Devil returned to the phone, "O.K., I'm
back. What can I do for you?"

The Lord replied, "I just want to know what kind
of problems you're having down there."The Devil said, "Hold
on again. I need to check on something."

After about 5 minutes the Devil returned to the phone
and said, "I'm back. Now what
was the question?
"The Lord said, "What kind
of problems are you having down there?"

The Devil said, "Man, I don't
believe this...."Hold on,

Lord" This time the Devil was gone 15 minutes.
The Devil returned and said, "I'm
sorry Lord, I can't talk right now. Them
Bahamians done put out the fire and
are trying to install air conditioning!!